This New York Pro has been abused

guitarz.blogspot.com:

The seller of the guitar keeps it short and simple. 

"New York Pro, refinished, new strings, tuned, sounds awesome"

Let's dissect it a little:

It's a New York Pro -  Hard to dispute or confirm as the headstock is not shown, but it looks like it's likely low range Korean offering.

Refinished - Well if you count intentional damage as a refinished job, then I guess so. Seriously, it looks like Marcellus Wallace got all medieval on it with a blow torch and pair of pliers.

New Strings - Phew, and I thought I was going to have to buy my own. There's a few bucks saved.

Tuned - Think of the hours I'll save. I wonder if I'll be able to get the seller to do house calls and tune it again if it ever should need it.

Sounds Awesome - The sound of an instrument is a very subjective thing, but I think that the judgment of this seller cannot wholly be trusted.

I generally don't like to be mean spirited when posting here, and yes we've called out horrible relics, bad customizations, and general guitar abuse in the past, but I feel this seller may be trying to dupe a potential buyer though, and sadly there are folks out there who wouldn't know that they were getting ripped off. 

Am I wrong? This is not a good guitar, is it?

For $250 I could have bought 8 of these guitars.

R.W. Haller

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When Relics Go Bad: Epiphone Dot Studio

guitarz.blogspot.com:

It's the long-awaited return of the occasional Guitarz series, When Relics Go Bad. I personally think that the whole concept of guitars that have been artificially aged is quite ridiculous. Whatever your opinions on the concept, it can't be argued that there are those who excel at the process of creating aged-looking used and abused guitars, and there are those - usually the enthusiastic amateur DIYer - who really should leave well alone.

Take for example this poor unsuspecting Epiphone Dot Studio semi-hollowbody. WHAT was the owner thinking? How would a guitar end up looking like this complete mess even after many years service as a gigged instrument. Unless of course, it is supposed to be the re-creation of a guitar belonging to legendary psychobilly band King Kurt whose live shows were notorious for flour, eggs, paint and all manner of missiles being thrown at the stage.

Thanks to Matt for bringing this abomination to my attention. The eBay seller is asking a Buy It Now price of $375 for this guitar. It might play well, but in this state a price like that is most definitely optimistic. Dreadful

G L Wilson

© 2013, Guitarz - The Original Guitar Blog - the blog that goes all the way to 11!
Please read our photo and content policy.

Yikes! The things some people do to guitars could almost make you weep!

guitarz.blogspot.com:

I nearly decided to offer up this photo to you as some kind of competition, as in "What guitar is this?" but I think it's probably too easy a question - not that the shape of the guitar is any giveaway, but rather the pickguard, control layout and tremolo speak volumes as to its true identity before someone took a saw to it and stuck furniture tacks all over it.

What a ghastly thing to do to a 1964 Fender Mustang. I suppose it's no worse than the way in which John Mayall cuts his Strats down to minimal bodies, but it still causes me to shudder. Someone out there is going to say, "I like it", I can just tell. But it's not my idea of customisation.

Currently being offered for sale on eBay - it'll be interesting to see how much this fetches.

G L Wilson

© 2012, Guitarz - The Original Guitar Blog - 10 years and counting!

Dano U1 in a sorry state

guitarz.blogspot.com:

I think we have a rather optimistic eBayer here. With a starting price of $3,500 and a Buy It Now of $4,500, even if it wasn't covered in all that crap this old Danelectro U1 wouldn't be worth anything near that kind of money. Furthermore, whilst the body is said to be from the 1950s, the neck isn't original and supposedly dates from 1967.

In the hyperbole of the listing the seller claims that "this guitar is for rock stars only" and that "If you really are a rock star and money is no object Buy-It-Now, for a guitar you'll never want to smash."

Yeah, as if that is the primary function of a guitar.

Someone has desperately been trying to create the illusion of a guitar with that certain "mojo" here, but it falls flat as being remarkably contrived. The sea-shell for a tone knob is one particularly banal touch. It's such a pity that someone had to spoil a vintage piece like this. If you want to be "arty" there are plenty of cheapo Chinese guitars to go wild on.

Thanks to Shubert Silva for bringing this guitar to my attention.

G L Wilson

Guitarz - The Original Guitar Blog - now in its 9th year!

Univox archtop - those of a nervous disposition may want to look away

guitarz.blogspot.com

BEFORE:
Here we have a nice example of a 1970s Univox archtop guitar...

AFTER:
...which was sadly reduced to this pile of rubble. What happened? Did someone trash it on stage in a Townshend-esque moment of passion?

No. It was allegedly destroyed by airline baggage handlers during transit, apparently despite being double-boxed. They couldn't have made a better demolition job if they had tried.

The moral is, I suppose, make sure you package your guitars ultra-securely if they ever have to by shipped airfreight. And seriously consider insurance.

Via db Twang.

G L Wilson

Guitarz - The Original Guitar Blog - now in its 9th year!

The SMASH guitar by K's JAPAN, built to be trashed and then recycled

guitarz.blogspot.com:
Regular Guitarz readers will remember my diatribe against smashing guitars on this post about Nine Inch Nails selling their old used - and sometimes abused - gear on eBay. The main thrust of my argument was that it is such a tired old cliché and surely after all these years bands can come up something more original by way of on-stage spectacle.

However, it seems a few lines of text on a guitar blog is not going to change the world, and such destruction in the name of music is not going to go away. As one commenter noted, each new generation finds it thrilling and exciting and they don't care less about what Pete Townshend got up to in prehistoric times.

And now from Japan (where else?) comes a range of guitars that are actually designed to be destroyed. The SMASH guitar presented by K's Japan is priced at 5000 Yen (less than $60) and whilst it resembles a Fender guitar, it has a lightweight hollowed-out body that should smash quite easily and dramatically.

Once you've smashed your guitar and amazed and wowed your audience with your shocking, if unoriginal, act of destruction, you have the option of returning the resultant debris to the manufacturer who will use all salvagable parts to make new guitars and donate them to orphanages in the Philippines. This is the recycling part of the equation. Alternatively K's JAPAN offer a custom re-building option so you can do it all again. Unless this re-build is significantly less than the original 5000 Yen purchase price, it might just be easier to buy a new one.

Other options include a SMASH amplifier to smash your SMASH guitar against (I expect it falls to pieces quite easily and spectacularly), a "pick bomb" (guitar picks fly out of the guitar in all directions when it is smashed), and a SMASH Visualizer chip embedded into the guitar "to visually show the movement and collision of the guitar on to [a] screen".

Potential smashers should be aware that they need to sign a liability form before being allowed to purchase this product, and should be aware of the small print that says:

"This product is conceptual based on rock spirit. It is not created to suggest act of violence. K's Japan will not be responsible for any kind of damage it may cause when using Smash at your own risk."

Thanks to Pelle for bringing this interesting product to my attention (via crunchgear.com).

G L Wilson

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When relics go bad... Mexican Tele abused with power tools

guitarz.blogspot.com:
I was going to just let the pictures do the talking, but I want to quote from the eBay listing of this very sorry-looking Telecaster:

You are bidding on a very cool guitar. [Who says I'm bidding? I was just LOOKING! - GLW] It's (sic) name is TED. Once it was a boring, almost offensive Mexican Telecaster with a Fishman Bridge. Now it is an edgy monster of a Telecaster that will get you more compliments than you can imagine. This guitar is in perfect working condition despite its appearance. It was disassembled, decorated, and then put back together with a stacked humbucker in the bridge position. I believe the middle and neck pickup are original. You can obtain an acoustic-electric tone with the Fishman, a traditional Telecaster tone, or both at once. Included in this package is a special sustain enhancing device attached to the headstock, the Fat Finger, made by Groovetube. It doesn't actually increase sustain, but it is a good conversation starter. Enjoy bidding on what some consider a work of art.... and yes, that belly cut was done with a sawzall. This guitar does currently need to be setup, but will play great once it is. A fender gig bag is included in the sale.

Truly dreadful.

What kind of compliments is this seller speaking of? "Hey buddy, you made a good ol' mess of that guitar with your electric drill, didn't ya?"

I would find the comment about the Fat Finger sustain device not helping with sustain but being a "conversation starter" hysterical, if I wasn't so appalled at the gross incompetence so clearly on display here.

G L Wilson

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NIN Epiphone Les Paul Gothic

guitarz.blogspot.com:
Nine Inch Nails have created an eBay account especially to sell off their old stage gear - guitars, keyboards, amplifiers, drums, staging, anvil cases, cables, rack/outboard gear, guitar effects, pedal boards, etc. Some items are in working condition and some items, such as this Epiphone Les Paul Gothic, are trashed.

Who in their right mind would pay over $400 for a broken Epiphone Les Paul? Oh... Nine Inch Nails fans. Without the NIN connection, it's worth just a fraction of that. Looking through their past sales there are broken Gibson and Epiphone Les Pauls that have sold for thousands. Crazy!

It's sad really. People are bidding on this (admittedly, not very exciting) guitar, not so they can repair it and make it playable again, but as a NIN souvenir.

I can feel a rant coming on. Isn't trashing your instruments on stage a bit of hoary old cliché now? I find it incredible that bands insist on resorting to such tired worn-out "shock tactics". Even Pete Townshend seems embarrassed by it these days.

I can understand bands want to put on an incredible show, to create a spectacle, but come on... use your imaginations!!! Let's see something NEW and different and exciting. Hell, you could even amaze and excite us with some incredible musicianship! Ever thought of that?

Trashing instruments is up there alongside on-stage nudity and self-abuse as the tired old clichés designed to shock which any self-respecting artists should avoid. Is that really the best they can do?

G L Wilson

ADDITIONAL: If you don't agree with me, fine. You are welcome to air your views in the comments so long as you do so in an CIVILISED manner. Personal insults and bad language are unacceptable and will not be tolerated. If you want to make childishly inane and abusive comments then please go back to YouTube.

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A Squier Showmaster in distress

guitarz.blogspot.com:

The seller of this Squier Showmaster currently for sale on eBay tells us that:

I did the distressed green finish myself - I can guarantee there is only one like it in the world

You don't say?

G L Wilson

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When Relics Go Bad ... (again)

guitarz.blogspot.com:

At the risk of being accused of writing yet another blog post which has "content generated by other people" (apparently ALL my content is generated by other people - see the comment by "Guest" here), I'm going to share with you this rather inexpert "relic" job on what apears to be an otherwise perfectly good Squier Strat.

This horror was spotted by Suzanne, who comments that "Heavy relic is putting it mildly. That thing looks as if it belonged to Sloth from The Goonies."

G L Wilson

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When Relics Go Bad

To quote from the eBay listing for this poor Thinline Tele:

"I 'modified' this guitar by dragging the body (without the neck and hardware obviously) down my driveway behind my 66 Mustang and then I set it on fire for a while."

I think that says it all.

Thanks to Rich for emailing me this one.

Those of a nervous disposition may want to look away

I am absolutely astounded and just a little bit disturbed that someone could have thought that this mutilation of a 1974 Fender Stratocaster was a good idea. Yes, I know some of those early 70s Strats were very heavy but taking a saw to one and carving it up does seem a bit extreme.

Butchered Fender Mustang

I sincerely hope that the buyer of this sorry-looking and carelessly butchered Fender Mustang intends to restore it to its former glory. I mean, just what is the meaning of that badly executed cut-out at the rear of the body? Please tell me that this is going to be patched up and repaired.

Why oh why do people resort to such butchery on something like this which is, after all, a vintage guitar? Such cackhanded DIY efforts should be reserved for the el cheapo guitars coming out of China these days. Having said that, of course, I don't know how long ago that poor Mustang was vandalised. The sticker is for David Bowie's "Tonight" album which was released back in 1984, so this axe abuse could date as far back as then. The Fender Mustang would still have been a desirable guitar, even then, so I really don't understand what was going through the mind of the perpetrator.

I love to hear from the buyer about his plans for this guitar.

When Relics Go Bad

The creator of this sorry-looking Telecaster ("I got the parts for it and put it together") claims that it plays better than a $3,500 Fender Custom Shop Relic Telecaster. I'm sure the Fender wouldn't look as much of a dog's dinner as this mess.

This is the problem with DIY "relic" guitars. The creator usually goes too far. This just doesn't look like genuine wear and tear. It looks like exactly what it is - a guitar that someone has deliberately knocked about and taken a sander to.

The seller also informs us that "The guitar's neck was sanded down and has a relic coloring from actual sweat." How, I wonder, did he collect the sweat? Did he carry a bottle and a tube around with him and somehow syphon the sweat into the bottle when working out? Actually, don't answer that. I don't want to know.

For a much more tastefully-realised relic job on a Telecaster, keep checking Cary's Electric Guitar Review.

Grrrrrrrrrrrr... What an IDIOT!

This kind of thing just makes me really angry!





This poor old Strat has been horribly abused. Have you ever seen such an appalling so-called "relic" job? The person who did this should be thoroughly ashamed of themself. Look at the back of the neck where it appears to simply have been set on fire. Check out the melted volume knob - as if that's really going to happen through the wear and tear of constant gigging. The fingerboard has been hacked away mercilessly - it's hardly the effect you'd get through constant playing and genuine use.

I've never been a fan of the whole "relic" phenomenom. The first time I ever saw some Fender Custom Shop relics I laughed my head off - especially when I saw the price. But at least the Fender Custom Shop guys know what they are doing, unlike the complete amateur who butchered the above Strat.

UPDATE: This piece of garbage sold for US $705.00 (approximately £339.00). I despair not only because of the complete ineptitude on display by the guy who carried out the "relic" job on this instrument, but also because it seems that there are people out there who are actually impressed by such amateur butchery.